the more you hurt, the more you love: an alternative bachelorettes’ party

Dearest ______,

Try Googling “lesbian bachelorette party ideas” and you’ll be surprised how same-sex preference is used as themes for straight couples’ Stag or Hen parties. While amusing to some, this bit of new information doesn’t really help you when you’re trying to throw a pre- wedding party for an actual gay couple. An interesting and unique occasion surely calls for something equally interesting and unique.


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holy moly holi!

Dearest ______,

First of all, don’t even start asking me what the Indians’ Holi Festival is all about.

I was with a huge group of Indian friends at one of the Holi celebrations in Singapore over the weekend and apart from acceptable midday drink- binging and the sheer happiness of throwing coloured powder and water at friends (more so, strangers), they weren’t so sure themselves.

And so under these limited grounds, we went.



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sugar and spice and –

Dearest ______,

There’s a slightly more rational voice inside my head that’s been telling me to post these photos on Facebook instead, given the amount of twee images or a bizarrely aching sweet tooth (if you are the overly emphatic type) this letter might leave you with .

However, there is also this ultra- girly girl inside that tells me to write you a letter about this, if only to keep pretty pictures lying around with the mail. You know, that pixie dust- believing, RomCom- watching, gushing-at-cute-babies side of every woman that allows her to appreciate a dainty spread for brunch or high tea.



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not with hens, but kitties

Dearest ______,

We, women, are a complicated lot: we over- think almost everything, we don’t make friends with each other as easily as boys do, we are at some point (or once a month) overly sensitive and emotional, et cetera.

Despite these eccentricities though, there are just moments when I’m amazed at how much women can be, well, amazing. Case in point: my Hen’s Kitties’ Night Out. AKA the Bachelorette Party.

Irene and Bea “fetched” me at Starbucks. The night before this, Angel and Maan texted me to do some “Homework” and bring an overnight bag. And that’s all that they said.
I was so anxious when I met them, I was sweating coffee out of every pore.

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happy bixie

Dearest ______,

I have this slight obsession with throwing surprises.

So when Vhop mentioned that she was planning one for Bea two weeks before the latter’s birthday, a theoretical hand went shooting up inside my brain going “Me! Me! Pick me!”

If we were studying Birthday 101, I would be that annoying student right in front of the class who answered most questions and volunteered all the time. I can’t help it: I want everybody to have an amazing birthday.


True to form, I volunteered to do the decorations.
I find this task very fulfilling simply because:-

1) For birthday decor to become truly meaningful- akin to designing a real house- it ultimately has to bear meaning to the person you create it for.

2) In the process of finding what other people love, you eventually discover or remember the things you actually love about them as well.


For Bea (a.k.a. Bixie), it was, and always will be, all about the music. It is in her very essence, such that dreams sing to her at night and during the day, the world moves around her in diversely exciting cadences.

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